Attack of the Lame DVDs

We were snagged and dragged by Luc Besson's Angela, a weightless flighty DVD that is wrecked by weak-minded plotting, and bored stiff by Antonioni's Blow-Up, which dragged and dragged like a dog with two broken legs, a nearly absolute vacuum of ideas at the core, worse even than the Coen's Blood Simple, which was truly irritating, the cast dragging around in slow motion from beginning to end with all these dull silences which were supposed to build tension but only made one want to look at one's watch, even in the dark, though the scene of the man being buried alive, one shovelful of dirt after another, was notably non-boring, and the mindlessly indecisive beginning of the love affair at the outset was a decent bit of filmmaking, but by far the worst of the lame DVDs we've recently watched was Kieslowski's The Double Life of Veronique, which went nowhere and said nothing, unlike the emotionally moving The Kite Runner, by whomever, seen on the big screen, which featured an arc for the protagonist from cowardice to bravery that was reassuring to think about afterwards as we walked to the subway along Tremont Street wondering if any of the creatures of the night we kept passing on the sidewalk were going to attack us.