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Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Screenplay Comments XIV

And then this, from Conqueror Joe:

Also, I see Clive as a guy who can’t lose at anything. He can’t miss a basket, lose a coin toss, or argument (or at least he thinks he wins all arguments). He’s living a charmed life. He can do some things we think are real stupid, but he’s not like us and the laws of physics, the laws of nature, and the LAW itself, do not apply to him. So, we cant’ project our pettiness on him. He deserves better.

In fact while he’s in the liquor store in the opening scene, the first thing he does before pulling out the gun for the hold-up scene is purchase a scratch ticket. Why? Because he’s Clive and that’s what he does. So, first he buys the scratch ticket. Then he does his thing and ends up shooting Frank.

Then while everyone is frozen and in shock and Frank is lying on the floor bleeding, there’s this long awkward silence post hold-up, post murder. Just doesn’t feel right. All the patrons are frozen. That’s when we here little scratchy sounds and next shot we see Clive scratching the ticket with the bump thing he picks locks with. Even Jill shows some interest. Why? Why not?

Why should he change his life just because some guy he shot is dead now. It makes no difference. Dead or alive, win or lose, you scratch the damn ticket! That’s what you do after you buy a scratch ticket. You buy it to scratch it!! That’s why! When he’s done he uses the bump thing to scratch the inside of his non-gun-hand ear (got that?). Then you hear him yell, “I won, I won, damn!, I won!” And that customer jerks his arms back in the air and yells, “How much?” then jerks them down again realizing third hold-up faux-pas, if you’re counting. Then you hear Frank who you thought was dead, gasp his last breath, a very long, gaspy breathy, death breath that’s a comment on the winning scratch ticket. Everyone turns their attention to Frank and his last gasp just incase there’s anything else. Clives not sure what to do, cause he wants to collect. He motions to Jill to pay him and she does. Then he leaves all the money in the register.

Three scene later she says “Why?” and he says, “Why what?” and she says, “Why didn’t you take the rest of the money?”

“Because I was having the thrill of victory, that’s why. Why kill the thrill?”

“That’s it?”

“That’s it”

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